10 GAY PEOPLe's Chronicle

SEPTEMBER 12, 1997

COMMUNITY FORUM

No limits in 1998

To the Editors:

The directors and supporters of Cleveland's Black Pride, Inc. would like to thank Cleveland's African American lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender communities for our enormously successful Pride Celebration.

We also want to thank the greater lesbian and gay community for their participation on Sunday, August 17.

Our organization has been gratified by the over 300-plus people who found entertainment, food, fun and camaraderie at Edgewater Park.

This unprecedented outpouring of support guarantees that Black Gay Pride 1998 will have no limits!

Those individuals interested in lending their strengths to our cause, please contact Cleveland Black Pride, Inc., P.O. Box 602093, Cleveland Ohio 44102, 216556-4704, or http://bbs2.rmrc.net/cbpi.

Cleveland Black Pride, Inc. Cleveland

Community Forum

The Chronicle encourages everyone to write and express your opinion about the community or the paper. Please, however, keep letters constructive, and avoid name-calling and personal attacks. Please be brief. We reserve the right to edit letters. We will print your name unless you specifically ask us not

to.

Letters must include a street address and phone, for verification only. They can be sent via U.S. mail, or fax to the addresses in the masthead above, or by E-mail to letters@chronohio.com

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GOK PEOPLES CHRONICLE

Volume 13, Issue 6

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A DECADE

CHICAGO'S GATEWAY SCULPTURE FOR ITS GLBT DISTRICT

SPEAK OUT

Back to school, as gay

and lesbian adults

by David Larson

Last September I called the principal of my former high school. His secretary took a message. "What is it regarding?"

"Gay and lesbian students." "Could you repeat that?" "Gay and lesbian students." "Oh."

I spoke clearly the first time. It's just that in Appleton, Wisconsin, as in many cities, gay and lesbian youth seem as remote as Kilimanjaro. The secretary had probably never written the words gay or lesbian before, especially on school stationary.

Gay and lesbian kids hide for self-preservation. They know that disclosing their secret crushes can lead to harassment or abuse from peers, teachers, and family members. It's no surprise that even caring educators overlook them or even doubt their existence.

When I attended high school at Appleton West, gay and lesbian people were officially excluded from the curriculum. During my senior year, a scandal erupted at Appleton East when a gay man spoke to a senior "social issues" class. Although the students had requested the speaker, the teacher was strongly reprimanded. Homosexuality was too dangerous to discuss.

Anything I learned about gay and lesbian people came from gossip. I remember stories about a boy at the ice rink who offered a classmate $25 for a blow job, a doctor in an emergency room who extracted a martini glass from a faggot's ass, and a popular Spanish

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teacher who quietly left town after indiscretions with boys on the soccer team. Gay men were sexual predators who ensnared youth into lives of perverted sex in dingy bathroom stalls. Lesbians existed only in male sexual fantasies.

Luckily, in college I met people with healthier attitudes. To them homosexuality was just another vibrant thread in the fabric of life. Lesbian and gay people could be as healthy and happy as anyone else. I came out, and slowly learned that I was fine; society was perverted.

I'm now a teacher. I worry about other gay or lesbian students struggling with self-esteem and overwhelming isolation. I have met too many students who have been harassed and attacked by their peers and read too many chilling stories of kids driven to suicide.

I needed to do something. I decided to participate in the "Back-to-School" campaign" sponsored by the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (formerly Teachers' Network), in which lesbian and gay adults write their former schools to raise awareness on how anti-gay bias affects young people.

I wrote to my former principal and recounted incidents of homophobia I witnessed at Appleton West and included a copy of GLSEN's "What You Can Do: Ten Action Points For Schools" with suggestions for things he could do to make it better today.

Somewhat to my surprise, he wrote me back. He thanked me for my letter and assured me of the school's commitment to serving all students. He asked permission to share my letter with others and invited my parents and me to address a committee meeting on serving at-risk students.

So last fall, I found myself with my mom and dad back at Appleton West for the first time since I graduated in 1988. I was nervous as I looked out at the faculty meeting. Many of the teachers there remembered me. Dad began with a story about marching with P-FLAG in Chicago's pride parade and the incredible reception he received. Countless strangers told him, "I wish my parents were like you!"

I told the committee that I was lucky because, unlike others minorities, gay and lesbian youth cannot always count on their families to teach them how to cope with discrimination. The school must reach out to these kids, since most fear their families will reject them.

My mom then told her own coming-out story, from grief over the loss ofher dreams for her (heterosexual) son and her "failure" as a parent to becoming an advocate for gay and lesbian rights. She let them know of her other local school districts grappling with the issue. She agreed it takes time for attitudes to change,

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but that there's no time like the present to begin.

Most of the counselors were silent but attentive. The assistant principal was respectful and sincere. The question period started.

"Did you know you were gay in high school?"

"How can we identify gay and lesbian students?"

"How should we respond to homophobic students or faculty?"

I answered personal questions honestly, and gave a crash course in Sexual Orientation 101. My parents and I emphasized that the school must treat everyone with respect and expect teachers to put aside any personal discomfort to create an environment where all students can succeed.

After the meeting, the assistant principal asked for information on the gay-lesbian support group at the high school where I teach now, so that he could think about setting one up in Appleton. A counselor invited my parents to address a social workers' conference. Another asked for gay-positive poster for his office. We left feeling we had accomplished our original mission. We shed light on invisible lesbian and gay youth. We will tend the seed of change that we planted, until the school truly teaches respect for all.

If I can make a difference at my school, so can you. Sit down today and write to someone at your former school. If you are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered, come out to them. Tell your story. They just might listen.

David Larson teaches math in a suburban Chicago public high school and is board member of GLSEN-Chicago.